My skin has that crawly feeling you get when you haven’t taken a shower in a few days. My head is foggy. My throat is a little swollen. My joints are a little achy. None of it enough to warrant alarm, but enough to make me look forward to getting into bed, even before I even get out of bed in the morning.
Oh, Bio-Kult. How wrong I was to think I could quit you.
You’re not all that expensive, after all. I can drop more on a weekend kombucha binge than you cost for a month’s supply.
Was it pride, then, that interested me in weaning myself off you? Maybe it was just the urge of misbegotten entitlement–“why do I have to take this, when other people seem just fine without it?”
But that’s the silliest thing, isn’t it? What does it matter? I have heard of you, and your 14 strains of beneficial bacteria have made all the difference. They’ve helped me sleep better, regulated my digestion, even made it possible for me to drink beer and eat bread in moderate quantities without any hangover.
Why then should I resent having to take you?
You even provided the basis for me to start oil-pulling. The time it takes for your bacteria to establish themselves in my gut is the perfect amount of time to swish coconut oil. It’s also the perfect time to make my bed, stretch, boil water for the tea I’m going to drink, and find myself, improbably, awake at a decent hour and ready to work. You’ve helped me forge the morning routine I needed, but couldn’t give myself.
The two weeks since I went to half-dose have been a slow descent. My skin is crawling, my head is foggy, and I feel that sort of oily rotten feeling that had faded into distant memory. Nothing else has changed–my diet is stellar, thanks to Diane’s commitment to the Weston A. Price regime, and the cool New England summer entices me out to run much more regularly than usual. Work is going gangbusters. So why should I be depressed and rundown?
The reason can only be the one thing that’s changed: less of you in my life, Bio-Kult.
But I’ve remedied that. I sourced you back to where I knew I’d find you. Two months of probiotic bliss, for only $32 plus S&H.
I can hardly wait for Wednesday. Even so, come quickly.